Desperate Housewives Africa episode 3 recap

Before I start, you guys have probably read our very own Wilfred’s scathing takedown of Desperate Housewives Africa. Well, you’re wrong, WIlfred. DHWA is here to stay because although terrible, it is terrible in a good way like Love & Hip-Hop. Just look at the show as a McDonald’s franchise opening in Nigeria. Everything from the menu to the colors is going to be the same. Why? Because that’s how franchising works!

Yesterday’s episode centered around some dinner party Rume organized before she killed herself. The housewives get the iPhone reminders and fake cry their way to Ese De Souza’s house.

Speaking of Ese, she’s the absolute worst. I know last week I defended her, but I’d like to retract that. As far as “worst” people go, Ese is the “worstest”. You see, she doesn’t really care about getting divorced per se. She just hates how it’ll look to everyone and the disorder it’ll bring. If there’s anything Ese hates, it’s disorder. Nini Warcera plays the role so convincingly. if I ever met her in real life, I’d probably project me feelings for Ese onto her. It’s not you Nini, it’s Ese.

The other housewives get up to their mini subplots as usual. We get to meet Tari’s ex-husband this week – Danladi. Absolutely terrible choice of character name. I’ll bet you $100 that Northerners don’t even name their kids Danladi these days. Sounds like a name you only meet in a Hausa textbook. Danladi is played by that one dude that won Big Brother when Ebuka won it. I wonder what homeboy is up to these days. He won the thing and yet Ebuka is more famous. Life comes at you fast.

Tari is still dealing with some hurt from her divorce and wants some closure. I’ll be honest, this little subplot was tedious and I wasn’t interested. I did, however, like the part where she snatched the wig off Danladi’s wife. That bit was hilarious. You can tell this is Michelle Dede’s, who plays Tari, first go at acting. She’s such an eager beaver with it. Enthusiastic and might over act sometimes, but she’d one of the better actors.

As for subplots we don’t need, Kiki’s whatever with her personal trainer needs to stop. Those scenes are unbelievably boring. I know her character is an important player in the original but can Mo Abudu make an executive decision and just kill her off. All ten of us that watch this show would greatly appreciate it. Less Kiki and more Funke because Funke is bae.

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The dinner party turned out to be a disaster. Ese’s husband gets tired of lying to everyone and admits they’re in marriage counseling because he wants a divorce. Although shocked, the others try to reduce the tension with self deprecating jokes, but Ese is not having it. Damage might have been done but it wasn’t done neatly so she goes ahead and calls her husband a wuss. Yup, job done properly this time. Mr. De Souza has had enough and decides to move out the house.

Random Notes

  • The voice dubs were much better this around. Better than the first two episodes.
  • Ozzy Agu and the dude who plays Larry are shambolic actors.
  • The neighbourhood vixen was nowhere to be found in this episode and I actually didn’t miss her.
  • Lastly, that VP Grass advert? Still as bad.

Desperate Housewives Africa airs every Thursday at  9 PM on EbonyLife TV (DStv 165).

Post Author: Nosa Oyegun

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